The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam
I just found via another funny writing site (Miss Snark, literary agent), the Fantasy Novelist’s Exam.
The intro:
Ever since J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis created the worlds of Middle Earth and Narnia, it seems like every windbag off the street thinks he can write great, original fantasy, too. The problem is that most of this “great, original fantasy” is actually poor, derivative fantasy. Frankly, we’re sick of it, so we’ve compiled a list of rip-off tip-offs in the form of an exam. We think anybody considering writing a fantasy novel should be required to take this exam first. Answering “yes” to any one question results in failure and means that the prospective novel should be abandoned at once.
An excerpt:
1. Does nothing happen in the first fifty pages?
7. Does your story revolve around an ancient prophecy about “The One” who will save the world and everybody and all the forces of good?
23. Does everybody under four feet tall exist solely for comic relief?
26. Did you draw a map for your novel which includes places named things like “The Blasted Lands” or “The Forest of Fear” or “The Desert of Desolation” or absolutely anything “of Doom”?
51. Do you ever use the term “mana” in your novel?
52. Do you ever use the term “plate mail” in your novel?
53. Heaven help you, do you ever use the term “hit points” in your novel?And more!
That was really funny. I had to blush at some of them, because I’ve been there. Um, still am, depending on the story . . .
Now to add Miss Snark to my Google RSS Reader . . . 